For some people, when relationships end on a good note there is the potential for some simple sex with the ex. While revisiting the glory of a former flame is an undoubtedly tricky, yet satisfying situation, there is something curiously magnetic about slipping back between familiar sheets. There are, however, a few golden rules to make the whole thing as mess free as possible.
Give it Time
Even if you’ve both agreed to stay friends allowing time between your break up and considering the whole ‘friends with benefits’ thing will give you the chance to assess your feelings and whether or not this is actually a good idea. Jumping back into bed with your ex five minutes after you broke up might seem like a good idea, but you can’t get over someone while you’re still under them.
Keep it Casual
Keep in mind they are your ex for a reason, no matter how great the sex is. Avoid trips down memory lane, and keep pillow talk light and fluffy. The brain tends to be pretty choosy about the memories it decides to cling on to so if you and your ex start reminiscing about the good old days, they may actually start to seem a lot better than they actually were at the time. So avoid dredging up old feelings, and complicating your relationship by not confusing casual f*ck buddy with confidant.
Resist old Routines
While jumping back into bed with an ex avoids all the awkwardness of a new bed buddy, you should skip any old habits that don’t happen between the sheets. Don’t put on your old favorite TV shows to binge together, or meet up at your old favorite restaurant. Bringing reminders of the “good ol’ days” will only blur the lines and lead right back to the dysfunctional days at the end.
Keep in mind that sex with your ex may be a good way to keep yourself from rebounding because you’re missing the intimacy, but the distraction of even the most casual attachment to your ex could cloud your eyes from sexier and more successful options out there. So make sure you both know this isn’t a permanent arrangement and keep that end in sight.
