We’ve all been there you’re in the heat of the moment and then one of you says something so off the wall it can ruin the entire encounter. The things people have said in the throws of passion range from hysterical to weird, to just plain wrong. We’ve gathered together a list of some of the most random and amusing things people have actually said in the bedroom.
I said this once after about 10 pumps: “SURPRISE!” Then I came all over her stomach. It was to cover my embarrassment at coming so quickly.
Really going at it doggystyle, and she tells him to talk dirty to her. He says that he can’t think of anything to say, so he says nothing, and she then repeats the request, but the second time she is not fucking requesting, but demanding it. He comes up with: “Yeah…you like that, you fucking retard?”
About a month ago my boyfriend and I were together and, while he always rocks my world, that night he had a super human burst of energy and managed to keep going for about half an hour longer than normal. Several orgasms into our tryst I apparently looked up at him in awe and wonder and said, “I should buy you a present!” He burst out laughing and collapsed on top of me, essentially bringing that round of love making to an end but giving us an inside joke that will always be funny
“That’s my stomach.” It was my first time and she was a bit overweight, I just stuck it where it felt the best.
“Girl taps on dick and says ‘is this thing on?’ While holding it like a microphone”
I was making love to a woman, my GF of a long time, and I was just starting to get to the edge, when she said, and I kid you not, “I’m your home, come into me.” I just sort of stopped for a few second and looked at her. Then the corner of my mouth began to twitch no matter how much I willed it not to. Finally I BURST out laughing and had to collapse next to her until my fits of laughter finally subsided. I laughed and found it humorous…. but I felt bad because, well, it made her cry that I was laughing, I tried to explain it to her but she didn’t see the humor.
My best friend and I were dating two roomates years ago. We were hanging out after watching a movie and they (friend and his GF) started kissing and carrying on, so they excused themselves into the bedroom. A little while later we heard the bed knocking up against the wall and moaning and groaning. The moaning and groaning started to get a little out of hand it seemed, and my GF and I were starting to giggle a little when all of a sudden my friend SCREAMS “Uh,ooooohhh, AAHHHHHHhhh-THOMAS!!!!!!” (MY name 😛 ). My GF and I fall over laughing while we hear his GF SCREAMING at him! Next thing we see is my friend running out of the bedroom laughing with a towel wrapped around his waist, ducking while a book comes cruising towards his head! The “I was just kidding honey!” didn’t seem to work on her- she was PISSED!
To make a very, very long story short, we ended up at my apartment one night and we started getting busy. He took off his shirt, and, to my astonishment, had several tattoos.One of them was a yellow Star of David. In my drunken haze and throes of passion, I asked him, “are you the sheriff?” He laughed straight for 20 minutes.
We would love to know what the craziest thing you have ever said, or heard, in the throws of passion is. Leave us a comment below and tell us about it.
