Have you been thinking about trying out a threesome. Don’t worry you are not alone and we are here to help! There are so many ways to pursue and have a threesome, so you’re going to have to really think about what you want. Here are some things to think about.

Talk to your permanent partner first

What are your combined sexualities? Who will be interacting with who, and what kind of activities are on the table? Some folks like to have threesomes without kissing or take the idea of penetration off the table. If you’re partnered and you’d rather not have the person joining you stay, kindly make that clear. If you’re open to that opportunity, make sure there’s plenty of space in your bed for three. Jealousy during a threesome with a partner is common for folks in monogamous relationships. Studies literally show that communicating or creating rules that benefit you and your partner can amplify feelings of comfort.

Watch for red flags

If you’re going into a threesome with a partner, there are a lot of things that can go wrong. Jealousy may rear its ugly head, insecurity may take over, or triggers may unknowingly become revealed. A threesome is a risky activity, and can highlight instability in your relationship. If someone is extremely eager to get down and dirty but dismissive when it comes to all the prep work like setting boundaries and managing expectations that person may not have your best interests at heart. Make sure you don’t have underlying relationship issues with trust, they could become worse adding a third person into the mix. You should also watch to make sure your partner is as enthusiastic as you are, and not just agreeing to make you happy.

Even though it may be scary to pursue a threesome, don’t let fear lead you. A threesome is a great opportunity to have a little fun, explore sexually, and potentially get closer to your partner in the process.